


Learning to hate goodbye's

by AlexTheShipper



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-12
Updated: 2014-11-24
Packaged: 2018-02-25 02:19:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2605010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexTheShipper/pseuds/AlexTheShipper
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Dean you love him.” Sam sounded irritated as he pointed out the obvious to Dean.<br/>“No shit Sherlock. What clued you in? Was it me glaring at the flirty waitress or putting my life on the line to protect him again?” Dean pondered over the reasoning behind his brother’s statement. <br/>“You know?” Sam asked earning a bitchface to rival his own.<br/>“Of course I know. I’m not an idiot Sam.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prequel: The road so far

“Yeah I figured as much, I mean what are you?” Dean studied the attractive human looking person in front of him.

“I’m an angel of the lord.” Castiel answered seriously and Dean wasn’t inclined to believe him but by the end of the encounter he had mentally dubbed the ‘angel’ attractive douchebag.

...

“Don’t you think you deserved to be saved?” Dean wanted to scream that of course he didn’t. He had tortured souls. He didn’t deserve to be saved, he deserved to rot. Instead he got an attractive angel that not only yanked him out of hell but stared at him as if he hung the moon and he didn’t deserve it.

…

Dean couldn’t help falling in love with those blue eyes. It wasn’t until Castiel left the vessal that he realized just how deep the attraction ran. This person in Castiel’s body eating burgers was wrong. He moved wrong and his eyes lacked that glow that Castiel’s had. The attraction wasn’t for the vessel it was for Cas and Dean found his heart aching.

When Castiel returned he was cold with Dean and the ache in his chest only grew. Something had happened to Cas and Dean would give anything to make it feel better. The urge to hug Castiel was hard to fight back, but Dean knew better than to encourage his own affections. People he cared about had a short life span it was better to stay unattached.

…

Dean was slammed into the wall by his angel.

“I’m hunted, I rebelled, and I did it, all of it, for you.” If Dean had any hope left he would have taken that as a sign, maybe Castiel liked him too. It wasn’t until the angel punched him again that Dean realized he loved him. Achingly, brokenly, and obsessively loved the angel, and maybe that would be a good thing, but the end was nigh. Still hope once again blossomed in his chest only to be stomped out hours later.

“That’s suicide.” Dean couldn’t watch Cas take on five angels. He’d shatter.

“Maybe so, but then I won’t have to see you fail.” Dean felt like hell in that moment and before he could respond Castiel was gone and Sam led him into the building. Everything seemed hazy and his chest ached. He could not fail Cas, not after this.

…

He managed. He didn’t fail Cas and Cas didn’t die and maybe everything should have worked out. Maybe Dean should have finally been happy. Instead he found himself developing an abandonment problem. The apocalypse us averted and Castiel leaves. Castiel sides with Crowley over him. Castiel doesn’t listen to his warnings. Castiel refuses to follow Dean out of purgatory. Castiel nearly kills him and Dean almost says it. _I love you._ Instead he says.

“I need you.” The blade drops and his wounds are healed and again everything should work out. Dean should get his happy ending, instead he’s left alone on the crypt floor.


	2. Chapter one- Risking your life

Castiel is human now, and Dean is inappropriately happy. He knows he shouldn’t be, but now Castiel can’t just disappear. Castiel is stuck here with Dean, and despite everything Dean is happy about that. Or he was until Sam started talking. Of course they’d do anything to help Cas get his grace back. Dean just didn’t want to think about it.

“We should be able to find your grace Cas. You’ll be all powered up soon enough.” Dean’s heart fell. He knew he’d help Cas find it. Castiel liked having his grace. Dean, no matter how badly it hurt knowing the angel would leave again, couldn’t take that from him.

“Thank you Sam. I appreciate it.” Castiel smiled weakly hands wrapped around a coffee cup and Dean wished it could stay like this forever. The three of them together, no more running off alone and accidently starting the next apocalypse.

“No problem Cas, in the meantime there’s been some weird deaths a few towns over. Wanna check it out?” Dean was totally on board with that idea and headed for the door grabbing his prepacked duffle from the hallway closet and tossing Sam his.

“Hell yeah Sammy. Cas you comin’?” Castiel nodded seriously as he grabbed his own duffel and followed them to the car.

“I didn’t mean now, and we’re leaving, great.” Sam climbed into the passenger seat with an exasperated sigh and begins explaining the case.

…

The case had proved simple so far, obvious signs of vampires on all the victims. The nest was clearly in the old barn outside of town and there seemed to be at least four different vampires. The major problems on the case had been Castiel’s brutal honesty with victim’s families and more currently the fact that the angel wasn’t used to being vulnerable. When fighting other angel’s he guarded himself well, but vampires were not normally a threat. Which is exactly why Dean was about to lose his head. Castiel was ignoring the vampire behind him in favor of fighting the first and Dean saw sharp teeth near his friends arm as it swung back.

“Cas!” Castiel wasn’t going to move in time, but Dean did. He put himself between Cas and those teeth laughing nearly manically as he faced death. He was going to die for this bastard all because of his stupid crush.  Luckily for his stupid infatuated ass Sam was on his game and rather than a bite Dean just wound up with the decapitated head of a vampire in his lap and a face full of disgusting bodily fluids. He didn’t even want to think about how unsanitary that was.

“Thanks.” Dean was already twisting away moving to help Cas.

“Anytime.” Sam moved more precisely than Dean would have expected after a few weeks of downtime. He dispatched another vampire easily and Dean turned back to the task at him. Time for Dean to show little Sammy how it’s done. In the end the body count was three for Sam, four for Dean, and two for Cas. Cas might have done better if Dean wasn’t bending over backwards to get them before they could hurt him.

They went back to the hotel to wash up and then decided to head out of town as quickly as possible. Sadly food would have to wait it’s always a bad idea to stay in a town with that many bodies.

 They had been in the car for nearly half an hour when Dean heard it. Normally after a hunt it was his stomach growling, but that noise was definitely not coming from him.

“Sam was that you?” In the rearview mirror he could see Cas fidgeting slightly.

“Not me Dean.” They both glanced back at Cas, who simply blinked owlishly at them in return.

“Ready for dinner Cas?” Dean teases. The ex-angel nodded seriously.

“I guess so, I’m not accustomed to feeling like this Dean.” Dean smiled reassuringly at his angel and began searching for a good diner. When he found one that served pie he smirked at Sam.


End file.
